Rethinking Control, Part 5: Giving Away Control to Meet the Needs of Children with Attachment Difficulties

Throughout this series about rethinking control, I’ve written about how you’re completely in control of yourself and nothing else. This includes your thoughts, feelings, and behavior. When you have a skewed understanding of what you can and cannot control, you may find yourself dealing with anger. One of the things that you cannot control, and … Continue reading Rethinking Control, Part 5: Giving Away Control to Meet the Needs of Children with Attachment Difficulties

Rethinking Control, Part 4: Helping Your Child Develop Their Internal Sense of Control

So far in this series on rethinking control, we’ve established that you are in complete control of yourself...and not a whole lot else. The inverse of this relatively unfortunate reality is also true: you are not in control of other people, including and especially your children. But for whatever reason, we have this expectation that … Continue reading Rethinking Control, Part 4: Helping Your Child Develop Their Internal Sense of Control

Rethinking Control, Part 3: 15 Things You Can Control Right Now

If you’ve read the first two parts of this series, you’re already aware that there’s so much in life we simply can’t control no matter how much we want to. Losing control, or realizing we never had the control we thought we had, causes us distress that often turns into anger. For those of us … Continue reading Rethinking Control, Part 3: 15 Things You Can Control Right Now

Christmas Hope for Foster/Adoptive Dads

Merry Christmas, fellow foster/adoptive dads, however it may find you. I absolutely love Christmas, but it can also be a particularly stressful time for foster/adoptive dads. The family is all together just a bit too much, the budget’s a little (or a lot) tighter, the chaos of the festivity can be overwhelming for the kids, … Continue reading Christmas Hope for Foster/Adoptive Dads

Rethinking Control, Part 2: Anger as a Reaction to Loss of Control

The following is the second part of a series of articles all about taking a fresh look at control, particularly when it comes to raising children. To read part one, click here. In the time I’ve spent both as a foster/adoptive dad and knowing/working with other foster/adoptive parents, I’ve noticed that we have a tendency … Continue reading Rethinking Control, Part 2: Anger as a Reaction to Loss of Control

Poetry: The Pilgrim’s Hallelujah

I saw a pilgrim on his way, It seemed to power and to fame. I followed to escape the fear of feeling. If, in his constant company, If, in his steps, a man I’d be, Then none would see I’m desperate for healing. . He marched as if by siren’s song, But then I feared … Continue reading Poetry: The Pilgrim’s Hallelujah

Rethinking Control, Part 1: Recognizing What You Can and Can’t Control

The following is the first part of a series of articles all about taking a fresh look at control, particularly when it comes to raising children. We hope this content is beneficial for you and that you'll stay tuned for more. If you read almost any parenting book, one word that will almost undoubtedly get … Continue reading Rethinking Control, Part 1: Recognizing What You Can and Can’t Control